I am very far from perfect and embodied of imperfections. I know, I know, it’s extremely hard to believe! I am only human. I do make mistakes on a regular basis, and probably more often than I realize. I will say things, unintentionally, that may be offensive to others, without even realizing it. I may have done something, unknowingly, that may have hurt someone’s feelings. Admittedly, I know I’ve done someone wrong as opportunity presented itself, to where it haunts my conscience. Regardless, it’s my life’s story, which I hope may inspire others. Without poor choices and mistakes made, valuable life lessons would not have been learned. Hopefully, because of these learned lessons, I will instinctively know how to better handle and/or conduct myself in future situations, if and when they ever arise. Life is an ongoing adventure faced with undaunting obstacles. I have grown up having high expectations of myself. Now that I am somewhat grown up, I have learned to show myself more leniency and to be more self-forgiving. Or I can just do or think the obviously easy response to everything from now on and just say fuck it. 😊
Life is full of surprises. People come into your life and choose to actively remain. Then there are others. Those people who are placed into your life for purpose and reason, may end up leaving unexpectedly. . . slow and easy, or like a bat out of hell! Those are the people who teach us life lessons. Either way, the experiences are what we chose to live during those moments. I’d like to consider my shared experiences as happy moments, without an inkling of regret or reservation. Those moments become memories over a lifetime. There are numerous experiences and memories that I love to share and talk about with others. Then, there are specific experiences and memories I choose to keep to myself. Honestly, I could write an autobiography that would make for excellent reading, raise an eyebrow, or turn a head! As tempting a task it may be, I refuse to put myself through tortured drama at this point in time in my life. Although, I’ll never say never to the notion. There is a high probability that I will eventually, but only when the time is right. Those specific moments are my treasured and intimate memories that I choose never to be free from. They are my personal and cherished collection of a lifetime full of happy moments. Each day I keep adding to my wonderful collection.
Been hostage long enough.
Guilty as charged.
Exhausted from holding onto it.
Self-sentenced internal punishment served.
Time to forgive myself.
Time to love myself.
Time to let it go.
I accept my gift of self-forgiveness.
Thank you very much.
This week’s been an eye-opener plus an emotional roller coaster for me. I just learned three people have cancer, all in various stages. Another friend had a heart attack just before his 50th birthday. I keep getting signs from a certain someone who’s passed, which can annoy me. To top it off, I feel at my wit’s ends on a weekly basis! How’s that for patience, healing and serenity! Lord, help me.
Better yet, Calgon, take me away!
I agree whole-heartedly agree!!
I wrote this very short poem as a dedication to those Guardian angels, specifically to one, who watched over my husband and kept him safe the other day after his accident. I was told by a very special person who they were and what they did. I had expected and was not surprised to learn of the one, but when told the other, I honestly was not too pleased to learn of. As difficult as it will be for me, I know deep in my heart I have to learn to accept that she was a blessing, and is still a blessing as she continues to watch over him.
Thanks for stopping by, and enjoy . . .
Not just one, but two
My gratitude to you
I know who you are
Always watching over him
From near and afar
I did my share of cleansing
Allowing pure light in
Considered now a blessing
Healing souls can begin
You may want to read my post “Blackout”